Mother’s Day. Surrounded by boxes and messes at home, struggling to process all there is to do before our impending departure in three weeks, and guiltily turning down my son’s request for pancakes, I stole away to a quiet corner for 20 minutes. I haven’t let myself reflect on anything recently – my mother, my own motherhood, my departure from work (paid work, that is), our departure from friends and community, my fears – because it’s emotionally paralyzing at a time when I can’t be paralyzed. But I needed to allow myself a little reflection time to prepare for a service my mom and I were giving this morning, so I stole those 20 quiet minutes.
I wrote a few reflections about my mom – including her constant encouragement, her strong presence as a grandma, and her unwavering support and acceptance of my tendency to keep leaving the country for far off lands (okay, Canada’s not so far off this time, but all the others are).
As I wrote, it struck me that she is one of many women I’ve encountered in person, via books, or online who have been role models through their actions and words. I found myself thinking of women in the sailing community that I am becoming a part of. The environment of inclusivity and support is empowering; there is encouragement to learn a vast array of new skills, support when confidence or knowledge falters, guidance in gaining new knowledge and capabilities, and inspiration for pursuing a way of life that is outside the mainstream. I’ve had gentle and confidence-building instruction from Nancy Erley on Tethys, received offers of rides to grocery stores in remote places, seen a community rally around a female diesel mechanic to organize seminars for women, and been inspired by new sailors trying things for the first time, to name only a few. And this is only to speak of the sailing community. Perhaps further in the future I’ll reflect in more depth on the paths and tracks laid by mentors, friends, and role models in other areas.
We haven’t untied the docklines yet (three more weeks), but I already feel the pressure of all the new hats I’ll be wearing – sailor, teacher, radio-operator, navigator, blogger, vlogger, mechanic (maybe assistant mechanic at first). But pressure feels more like excitement and giddy anticipation when I think of the support and inspiration that is out there among women who sail – how we can encourage, teach, and – in essence – mother each other as we pursue a life on the water.